August 15th, 2001


(no subject)

Talking to the NCR guy today about the self service checkouts that they've given us (we're a test market. You can bet they'll be in ALL your towns soon. The first week they were installed, 20% of the store volume checked out using them), I had to adress the customer acceptance and why I felt they were looked on the way they are...
Just some crap to see if their testing is working out, if they can replace more of our workforce with one live person to every 4 machines.
But we were talking about the interface, and the fact that there *are* some things that could be more clear... but the problem with getting that implimented (he started babbling about commitees... apparently the commitees really get to him) and so forth.
And the phrase "The interface is very very User friendly." came out of my mouth.
Followed by "It's like using a Mac..."
I said "user" in such a way that he felt the need to ask me how I had meant that...

And I realized that Mistah lovah lovah has created a self fulfilling prophesy.
Because he keeps insisting that I'm a geek.
I think that maybe it's just happening through the power of suggestion.

Or maybe I'm just a geek.
I'm thinking of buying books.
I want another box for unix.
just to learn
just for the hell of it.

somehow fixing my keyboard became a plus in the geek column.

And at work, I'm the only one who can talk to tech support without it being a 3 hour call where they spend the majority of that time just explaining everything to our dumbass employees.

So maybe I'm a geek.

Not saying I am
Just saying maybe.

I need to get a job where I do service calls on people's crap.
I would have so much fun.
I like fixing things like that.
I like working on all our equipment at work.
I like setting up systems and rebooting machines and switching out components.

What the fuck is wrong with me?
Where did this come from?
Is this that niche that I could never find?
Am I supposed to be a geek?

(no subject)

Just had pizza
very full
driking coffee
burning tongue
avoiding assholes

talked to Robert today.
He wanted me to meet him somwhere, I told him that I didn't really feel like it.
He told me it was because he was going home tomorrow.

I told him that I didn't really feel like it.

Have a nice flight.

nice knowing ya.

He said he'd write. I called him a liar. He didn't protest it.
He's just not cut out to be a father figure, he says.
And I hurt him.
By telling him he wasn't cut out to be a father either.
He asked if that would ever be forgiven. (he meant MY forgiveness)
And I said no. ( I meant TOM'S forgiveness)
He asked why.
And I pointed out that the only person who could have is dead.
He asked.. "well, what about you?"
"what about me?"
"well, you know I tried, right. I really tried a lot. I just... I can't do it."
"yes, I know that you're to selfish to be devoted to anything other than yourself. I hope for your sake that that changes at some point in your life. I just hope that you're not too old to be able to enjoy it. It'll be a bitch finding your heart at 90 years old."

And then he spewed a lot.
About my judgements, how they're off base, how they're hasty... how they're cruel.

and they probably are.
And I don't care.
I hate what he did to Tom.
I hate the way he bamboozled me.

I won't miss him.

(no subject)

I tried to go to my friends list and got the message that "User Maddening has messed up their journal template definition."
heheh... that's a new error messagge for me.

(no subject)


The 17th street Jester is on there.
It's the only head shop in this gaddamned city.
And they sell a lot of nice knives too.
  • Current Music
    Nine Inch Nails - Hurt

(no subject)

Reasons to Avoid My City:

Number One...
It's the Headquarters of the 700 Club

Number Two...
A hell of a lot of Neuvo-Wiccans live here...

and then you get their bastard children, the unitarian universalists...
or people like this.

Poor schmucks.

(no subject)

It's amazing what a little eyebrow maintenance can do for your face.
I just had this lil epiphany.
In a couple weeks I'm going to have someone here.
Some new person.
That's never been in person with me before.
We will probably be closer than five feet from each other at at least a couple points in the trip, ya know.
I've completely forgotten how to be a girl.
I don't do anything with my hair.
I don't worry about my skin.
I don't even think about how my breath smells.
Because, well, there's been no reason.
And then all of a sudden... I had to pluck my eyebrows, and start thinking about clothing... and what to do with my hair.
Not that he really *cares* about that stuff. But I tend to care about that stuff when there is someone around that makes me feel like I should be caring about that stuff.
I don't freak out on it.
I just like to make sure that I don't look hideous.
I'm very low maintenance anyway.
facial scrub for the flakes, moisturizer for the dry spots, pluck the eyebrows, file the nails, brush the hair... that's about it.
No makeup or hair crap. I don't even own hairspray.
So it isn't that big of a deal, but well, when you haven't done it for months, you realize just how much you've kind of... let yourself go.
I need to do three million crunches.
I need to get a vacuum for an at home liposuction for those matronly upper arms.
I need a tornado to hit my room and destroy everything to make cleaning so much easier.
I need for this to not freak me out so much is the bottomline.

(no subject)

"I can't believe that!" said Alice.
"Can't you?" the Queen said in a pitying tone. "Try again; draw a long breath, and shut your eyes."
Alice laughed. "There's no use trying," she said, "one can't believe impossible things."
"I dare say you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

(no subject)

someone explain video head cleaner to me.
purple, maximum impact, rush, ... what the hell ?
simple inhalant?
what's it do?
I find lots of sites from belgium that specialize in it with lots of sites that sell sex toys for men selling it along side their water sport nozzles...
but no real info.

time to hit erowid I think