December 17th, 2001


(no subject)

"Hello, may I speak to Chad"
"yeah, hold on.....::yelling::CHAAD!..::speaking to chad:: you can't talk ::mumble mumble:: tell her not to"

and then the phone died.


I guess I won't even try to call unless I know.. unless I KNOW that you're out of the house.

He's on the OTHER SIDE OF THE COUNTRY. The phone is all we have.

(no subject)

I've had a trying day.
Woke up early. Did some cleaning. Got shit done. Made some things. Dealt with the prick who donated the sperm. Talked to Tim (he saw the entry and was not happy... so I let him know I was holding back a lil there... wasn't nearly as blunt as I had wanted to be.. and he mellowed, but was still pissy. So fuck him) did a lot of sitting around wondering why I was so utterly bored. Got to talk to Chad for all of 10-15 minutes before his dad woke up and, didn't need to use the phone (though he picked it up and said "hello" into it) but just wanted it to not be tied up. Apparently call waiting isn't good enough, he needs to hear it ring, so Chad had to go. Sat around bored some more, made some more things, fucked up a few things I was making, had a very enjoyable conversation with a drugged up whip_lash, tried to call Chad and was hung up on, and given the lil bit of mumbling I heard, I know it'll just be bad for him if I called back.

So I guess I'm going to go read some more of Choke, the new Chuck Palahniuk book (it's dark, seedy, very very morose... very good. Think "Filth" by Irvine Welsh, minus the tapeworm, plus more introspection, minus the brogue, plus a sexual compulsives 12 step program. Smirking, wry everyday horror. ) And maybe I'll be able to sleep.
I'll try Chad back tomorrow I guess. Sometime during the day before his dad gets home from work. Maybe we'll be able to pull of a whole conversation at some point.

Or maybe I should just fucking wait until tuesday.
I don't know. I'm kind of upset about that at the moment, so it's not really the time for decision making.

I'm just tired in a lot of ways.

(no subject)

I lied... I'm going to hang around for awhile longer. I'm tired.. but I also am freezing. Gonna drink some tea, warm up a lil, and, of course in the hopes that chad will be released from bondage in the land of the EEEEVIL ONE and will be able to talk.
Becuase.. he'll probably WANT to talk ...
So yeah.. I'm here for awhile longer.

(no subject)

I think I might be having a grouchy day. I only felt the need to reply to one inbox coment today and It was with "reading comprehension is a virtue"

I really do think it's a self delusion.
It's something people want, convince themselves it will work, and just keep clinging desperately to that. Maybe if you just don't care *too* much about anyone involved.
I am one of those silly fuckers that thinks that humans aren't really built for it.
Not mentally.

IF YOU ... YOU... want to establish a polyamorous relationship and it works out for you, excellent, I'm glad you found a way that you can have a relationship... some people never do.
But proselytizing seems to go hand in hand with the polyamory enthusiasts and I'm sick of trying to be converted.
Not that that's what this guy did. Not at all. I just happened to wake up with this chip on my shoulder? Heh.. and no, I'm not going to apologize. So I was an ass ::shrug::: I'll have to live with that.

(no subject)

I just got a box from Barnes and Noble.
A Treasury of Harold and the Purple Crayon and Ascending Peculiarity, Edward Gorey on Edward Gorey.

frobisher Just rocks!
Thank you sooo much Dave.