February 26th, 2002


(no subject)

Things I want, long term and short.. (no deliniation... you figure it out)

a drum machine.
another cup of coffee
a back rub
a house with a dark room
a file server
a T-1
more books
enough book cases to actually hold all the books I already have.
the head of john the baptist.
this song to be 20 minutes long.
more reggae
the guy from Converge to SLOW DOWN AND ENUNCIATE... you write a beautiful song, then I can't understand a damned word of it with all that *screaming*

sort of lost my list form there, huh?
I'm a wanting wanting person. But nothing is so extreme that I can't deal.
I want to be in Washington. I don't care where in Washington as long as it's in the same place as Chad. And then when that is achieved I want the world to be nice to him for a couple weeks at least until I can contruct a good protective bubble sort of thing all around so the shit storms will bounce (splat?) off.

and then I want some green.

Simple things really.
Everything else is negotiable.
  • Current Music
    Aphex Twin - Log N Rock Witch

(no subject)

Today is my parent's anniversary.
It's well established that I really can't stand my father. BUT... he's done well this time. My sister on Sunday told my mom "I'll call you on Tuesday" and my father said "what's tuesday?" and just sort of laughed and said 'nothing"
So they think he has no clue that today is his anniversary.
To the point where he was going to take a half day off work so that he could go out, get the thing for my mom that he wants to get her, and then be home at the same time he would have normally been home.
Now, I don't like the man, but I'm giving his crafiness a big thumbs up.
I think I might do something weird to my hair this week. I really should have gotten up earlier today to attempt to *accomplish* that.. but.. feh.

I'm almost done with the kitchen. What the hell am I going to do when I don't have the kitchen to work on? hmmm..

I'm going to rewatch some invader zim and contemplate that.

(no subject)

I just saw a live performance (on the very local news channel... and it was actually *in* the studio) of Leif Garrett's new band. They're... interesting...
The studio certainly isn't set up for this sort of sound...And they sound like every other "playing in a bar that advertises live music" band I've ever heard. This will not be his big come back.
Poor lil Leif.
All that heroin.

From this

To This


Guh.. he never dies

Will called me.
Had to recount huge chunks of his life again. And tell me what a good friend I am.
I did nothing but HATE HIM for several years. I told him again and again that he needed to GO AWAY. He stalked me. He called obsessively. He wouldn't leave me alone. I FINALLY got him to go away and he keeps fucking calling. Still.
He's still suffereing under the delusion that I am somehow his buddy.
No matter how many times I say "You are a psycho." or "You're still the same deluded freak who thinks that we're friends" or even "Why don't you just *leave* *me* *alone*?" he thinks that it's all just happy banter.
Telling me about his med free life and how the doctors are all idiots just making money off of the pills they give him.
there are no words for what he is.
He's a damned freak.

I was 17 when I met him... I was 20 when I finally got him to leave me alone the first time... isn't he ever going to leave my life?
How long am I going to pay for this mistake?