I have a tendency to not eat. I know this.
I have a tendency to not take the supplements I know I should be taking. I know this.
That's part of the lethargy problem. But more than that I'm just depressed a lot lately.
Although today I was in an excellent damned mood.
And I had an excellent good talk with Chad (and I'll talk to him again later).
And before that I talked to Akadashi and found that, yes, it's possible for people on my coast to not be idiots (and for some of them to be pretty incredibly cool as well)
We've broached the subject of Chad coming to *this* coast. The problem with that is the same problem he has out there... a job. But there just seems to be more of a chance. Washington is killing the geeks. *Killing* them.
Dragging them out of their homes and just Slaughtering them in the streets until the gutters run red and chunky.
But still somehow geeky.
I'm in a good mood.
It's... it's a strange feeling... it's been awhile.
And I have visine!
And I need to oil that gasket to get the stem out so I can see if I have resin. (well, I know I have resin.. but if I can't remove the stem, it's going to be almost impossible to get it out)
But I don't have a screen.
I have a feeling it's all going to end up being more trouble than it's worth. But considering I haven't smoked anything since december, a nice ball of resin will do me for a week at least.
I keep hoping my father will eat the 3 year old chocolates that I found in the cabinet. If I didn't want him to eat them, they'd have been gone last week. As it is, it looks like I'll have to throw them out, dammit. Just a little discomfort, vomiting, explosive diarhea... that's all I ask.
Last night he took so long to get home and he was drinking while out that Chad mentioned and I secretly hoped that he'd just.... spin off the road somewhere. Fuck the implications. Fuck the fact that that would leave my mom in a seriously bad situation...
I don't think death thoughts often, but when I do, they're honest.