But she doesn't understand what I'm saying when I say, in a very very tense voice "I am really scattered right now, it is sooo soo hard to think."
She keeps trying to divide my attention. Trying to remember people I half knew from a few years ago. Talking about movies and actors and things she wants to see.
It's her birthday.
And I'm so scattered that what I really need is a blanket to hide my head under until it goes away.
or some meth.