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Aug. 23rd, 2002

Scrolling through NeilGaiman.net, I found this first line from a description on an audio book:
"Gaiman, Neil - Warning: Contains Language Audio CD's (DreamHaven Books 1995)."

Fancy that, eh?

On an entirely different note, the pro-ana communities are *still* disgusting, *still* out of line, and *still* only populated by disturbed little girls who've bought the lie or deluded themselves into thinking that their self worth is somehow attached to their current weight. Little girls, never women. I doubt any of them will *ever* be women, physically or emotionally.

Most of the chickies in the pro-ana communities on LJ strike me as bandwagon riders. I wonder how many of them are into self-injury too.

Update: I posted this before I scrolled through the rest of that ana_in_college community and saw the rest of the posts. It wasn't meant as an attack, but I still have no sympathy. You're not dumb. Don't behave as if you are. You aren't them, don't convince yourself that you are. You know that you aren't them. Don't damn yourself to that.


( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 23rd, 2002 10:06 am (UTC)
Ah, you found my secret.

Aug. 23rd, 2002 10:12 am (UTC)
Incidentally Holly, if you have something you want to say to me or tell me, please do so. I get the feeling you're trying to tell me something with this entry, and am having the urge to answer back with an entry in my journal, which is how these dramas get started.

Bottom line: I insist until I'm blue in the face that I don't have an eating disorder. But I flirt with it, with those communities, dipping a foot into the water to see if I still have the willpower to back out. Staring into the abyss and posting in the abyss to see how these things get started.
Aug. 23rd, 2002 10:28 am (UTC)
Aug. 23rd, 2002 10:38 am (UTC)
Actually I didn't realize you were actively posting there until I kept reading, after I made this post (hence the update with the clarification). I've ranted about these communities before, but if it were meant to be directed at you, I would have just directed it at you. I've never been shy in that arena.

I think that "staring into the abyss" is a lousy reason. I *know* you don't have an ED, you know it too. What's to flirt with? Girls with eating disorders don't ask any willing to come on over and take nude photos of them. You know that.
If you're simply exerting your willpower, why not try it out on the problems you *have* instead of the problems you might have? I know it's easier. But why exert the effort pointlessly?

Aug. 23rd, 2002 10:54 am (UTC)
It's fascinating. A trainwreck. I sometimes even think that maybe by posting intelligent stuff in there I could shake some of the girls out of their idiocy.

The ones who turn to "ana" to lose weight are dumb, yes. But some of the people who post in communities like eatingdisorders (as opposed to the pro-ana communities, eating disorders is a support for people who have, have had or are trying to recover from eating disorders or food issues) are intelligent young women struggling with a disease and the effects of acute starvation (if you haven't read the minnisota study, I recommend you do -- it's fascinating). That doesn't mean that they're not manipulative and mistaken in thinking that being a lower weight will solve everything, but some of them are remarkably intelligent in other arenas.

I'm wondering if I could carry out a study on this sort of thing. No-one's looked into the phenomenon of pro-anorexia in a clinical, non-scaremongering way before (or if they have, I haven't heard about it) and I would love to understand what makes these girls glory in their disease. There's a bit in The Golden Cage -- the enigma of anorexia nervosa that explains the processes of denial that anorexics go through, but none of those processes really fit with what I'm seeing in the communities I watch.

Then again, I come away from the communities with a better understanding of what is a healthy way to lose weight (1,500 calories a day, 5 servings of vegetables, 64 floz of water, a rounded exercise regime of about 30 minutes 4 times a week), something I'm doing remarkably well at keeping in mind. Rather like looking at the tar-blackened lung to keep from becoming a smoker, I feel.

That was long and rambling. Short answer: I'm fascinated, but in no danger of becoming one of them. Consider it advanced training for my psychology degree.

Aug. 23rd, 2002 11:08 am (UTC)
But to me, that's entirely different from flirting with ED.
I'm fascinated by serial killers and the extremes of abnormal psych. That doesn't mean I flirt with schizophrenia or severe disassociative conditions. It means I'm fascinated by it.
I may write a letter to a serial killer or read books about and by them, but I wouldn't count myself amoungst them or present myself as one of their number.
(no, I'm not trying to compare serial killers and people with eating disorders)

Posting in the communities and saying there that you know you're in and of it is very very different from simply reading and learning and wanting to read and learn more. And, to me anyway, the first behavior is 'flirting' with it, while the second is anything but.

Dunno.. don't mind me..
I just don't want to see you get too wrapped up in something like this. I know it has a pull and I know you're so much more intelligent than that. Consider it me, fretting... or as close as I get to it.

Aug. 23rd, 2002 01:09 pm (UTC)
Well, I *do* have food issues. But don't worry about me, I am too fond of food to get drawn in.
Aug. 23rd, 2002 11:44 pm (UTC)
And if you did, I could always go hint at dave in e-mail that he should take up the perversion of having you slurp fresh vegetables and medium-rare steak off his naked body.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )


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