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Oct. 19th, 2002

I can't tell if I did the right thing, the wrong thing, or if there was such a thing in this case. I'm not sure how I feel about it this morning. I wasn't sure how I felt last night, the night before or last week either so...we're at least maintaining a level of confusion.

I had dreams with Ken in them. He came to visit me and somehow or another brought along a lot of insanity in the form of child musical groups performing in a competition. Judges, children with numbers pinned on their sweaty shirts, and disgustingly dischordant song filled every room of the place while Ken kept screaming above the noise trying to be heard.

And I say "dreams" with Ken in them becuase my dreams tumble from thing into another and are certainly different things. By the time we got to the point of my having to dive into the water and climb up the rusted ladder at the back of the partially submerged holding box in order to lift the grate high enough for the customers to get a look at the toaster they were thinking of buying... it had definitely been multiple dreams.

Somebody just came home.
I'm really not ready for people.

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