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SO now it's day three with the exceedingly ouchy stomach.
I'm trying to look around, see if I can find anything that's *helpful* without being like, a pitch for a drug, the wrong sort of treatment, or just plain old hysterical.

One of the pages I found is this doctor guy's site where he tells you little things about hostpitalization, medical care, etc. And on one section is a 'home remedies' portion.
It should really be a list of "what you shouldn't diagnose or treat yourself" as he's even reccomending that insect bites and stings should be seen by a physician because you never know when it might be from a very poisonous/toxic insect.

Anyway, there is a listing for "anxiety" and this is part of what he says :
Anxiety frequently indicates that a person has not managed life’s challenges adequately. The perception of failure leads to coping problems which results in anxiety. Physical illness may result from stress in this way. "

Man... FUUUCK this guy.
Have not adequately managed life's challenges? That's the most frequent indication for Anxiety?
"Anxiety is your own fucking fault for being a failure"
gaaaaah

But he's in South Carolina, so that's alright then.

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maddening
A Non-Newtonian Fluid

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