A Non-Newtonian Fluid (maddening) wrote,
A Non-Newtonian Fluid

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I'm feeling particularly in love with Karl today.
I mean, I always feel in love with Karl. But there are just some days where the whys and hows feel particularly strong. Today is just one of them.

I didn't post about it, but a few weeks ago when he was in New York for work for a day and a half he sent me not one but two different big bouquets of flowers. He was gone for a day and a half and he missed me.

We've been together for over a year and have been best friends since the day we met over two years ago. We're getting married in October (we have a tentative date even) and I've never felt a twinge of doubt about any of it, for a second.

Oh I've doubted if it was reciprocated. Especially when he was still feeling like relationships didn't exist, love didn't exist, and that there would never be such a thing as "the right person". But I've never doubted that it was there. We've been through a lot in our own ways. We've both changed so much since we met each other and all those changes were made together in one way or another. Some of this change has been really difficult to get through, but most of it just requires a quick talk, a check in, a glance and a nod and I know it's all okay.

I'm not one for sappy love love love posts. In the past when I've been like that it's been becuase it's how I'm *supposed* to be, not becuase it's how I actually feel. Saying isn't believing, despite how much we're all capable of talking or thinking ourselves into things.

Someone who was once a friend of Karl's (and sort of a friend of mine I guess) said that it's not who you love, it's who you can live with. There was a point in time when I could have very easily echoed that sentiment. I'm thankful every day that my experiences with karl have taught me otherwise.

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