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oh my god , fuck you LJ

So ... with just a very tiny amount of looking into it, I have to say that the majority of people I've seen who've posted that sexual abuse meme (proclaim to the land of LJ that you've been abused and wear it as sort of badge of honor) are currently poly, heavily into BDSM, M/s relationships, or just enjoy showing their tits to the world repeatedly becuase it's "their choice, their body".

Some could see that as taking the power back, as exercising choices over who sees, who does, who is allowed on their own terms. And there is of course the slim chance that that's the case... but it's really doubtful.

Why don't most people see that behavior as a side effect? It's not that difficult to see that being sexualized at an early age (in the case of childhood sexual abuse) really easily lends itself to high levels of promiscuity and the NEED for sexual attention later in life. Girls who were abused as pre-teens typically end up equating (subconsciously usually) sex with love. If they don't want to fuck you, they can't possibly care about you. Affection is EQUAL to sex. This is especially true in the case of abuse from family members, older male family members.

This is just personal experience. I'm not a clinician, no training, haven't had some course work or a doctor to tell me it's so. I don't have any sort of statistics to back it up. I don't think I need statistics.

Anyway, this is one of the things that bothers me the most about forums like Live Journal. They aren't avenues for self discovery, they're the means to futher delusion and just another way to hide.

(I'm also really ticked by the number of "when I was a teenager, a peer pinched my ass, therefore I was sexually abused" instances I've seen. How fucking demeaning to anyone who's actually been through something terrible. Everyone has their different levels of tolerance, different levels of strength. I accept and understand that. But some people go out of their way to make up a terrible life that didn't exist, and how incredibly thoughtless is that?)

Comments

akadashi
Aug. 4th, 2004 08:41 am (UTC)
People are just sad.

The idiots who CHOOSE things like anorexia, cutting, and god knows what else as a lifestyle/identity to get attention really make me ill because I've known plenty of people who were honestly driven to that kind of behavior by horrifying things that happened in their lives. So many sad and boring people out there trivialize the terrible things that other people experience against their will, and it's all in a pathetic attempt to seem interesting.

I worked with a young woman once who went out to bars every weekend and randomly hooked up with guys she met there. Every few weeks it seemed, when asked how her weekend was she would very casually claim that she "got raped again" so she wouldn't sound like a slut for having sex with all these random guys. Other people from the office had been to the same bars and had seen her basically slutting it up and throwing herself at these guys all night until one took her home. Now granted, nobody followed her home and watched her have sex with these guys (or tell them she didn't want to), but every few weeks? Never calling the cops? Immediately going back to the same places and doing the same thing? Sorry, but "rape" doesn't mean "man, in hindsight, I really wish I hadn't had sex with that guy I just met in a bar... it really makes me look and feel like a slut".

Also, "slut". Because I need to use that word a few more times in this comment.

GUH.
mjfgates
Aug. 4th, 2004 09:26 am (UTC)
Y'know, you didn't use "bitch-slut" at ALL. I feel deprived now.
maddening
Aug. 4th, 2004 10:06 am (UTC)
how bout cunt-whore
I was hoping for some cunt-whore action there.
akadashi
Aug. 4th, 2004 11:06 am (UTC)
You were hoping for some gutted whore action and you know it. You're sentimental that way.
maddening
Aug. 4th, 2004 11:50 am (UTC)
Bebe, I ALWAYS gots me some gutted whore action.

I OWN THAT SHIT

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