So at some shift change the screeners let a backlog of x-rayed carry-ons back up and the x-ray showing a gun wasn't noticed until the bag and the gun were well on their way into the terminal. They shut down the terminal, cleared it out, made everyone go back through security, and never found the supposed gun.
Once we finally got to Cincinnati we found out that our rescheduled flight to DC had actually been cancelled due to mechanical issues. So we got to rebook on a phone there and got an "amenities kit" and vouchers for dinner and a hotel room. We had dinner, had some drinks, had the first comfortable night's sleep in almost a week (the guest room bed at the folk's place is somehow hard AND saggy), and caught a flight back this afternoon.
Florida is probably the white trash capital of the US. Not redneck capital. white trash. And in the depressed economy of a Resort Town/ Nascar haven , it's supremely expressed. Gorgeous sunsets, lots and lots of very old drivers, and teens just aching for 16 so they can finally start a family just like mom and dad.
Ohio on the other hand is a completely different kind of pit. I am sure that this was amplified by the proximity to Kentucky, but I'm sure that further toward the center it stays just as pit-like. "Slack Jawed Yokels Around Every Corner" should be the Ohio state motto.
Also: subbes' mom works at a Mariott hotel restaurant. Video to come! We could find no other explanation for the slight, brunette, middle-aged british woman to be anywhere near there.
I'm not really *tired*... just sort of wrung out. I'm home, our dog is blissfully sleeping off the 5 full days of playing with other dogs, and I can take comfort in the fact that I do not live in Florida, Ohio, or Kentucky.