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I just went through 3 different "work out" tapes until I found one that was actually a "work out" and not some disgustingly over-muscled, fake tanned, bleached, manly freak woman doing a really quick re-enactment of an exercise with a backdrop of all of the fitness equipment sold by that company.

it's nice to find one that had a challenging work out that didn't literally make me just loathe them all. Like the Lotte Burke thing. I liked the work out overall, especially since it was all based on you stretching/using your own strength, etc. but without the "okay, breathe through your navel, strong center, now place your foot behind your head. Aaaaand, squat, and lift, and squat, 12 more.." etc. shit. The problem was the three chicks in the video were these bizarre ballet girls. I realize Lotte Burke is a dance method. Yeah. But uh ... can I see some people doing it who *aren't* naturally 4'11 and 75 lbs with perfect makeup, hair, staring at me like children of the corn to the fucking Yanni soundtrack?

anyway, Karl's been out of town since yesterday morning. I'm trying to wrap up a lot of work without finding every other thing on earth to do. When he gets back I want to be done with this shit.

I recieved 3 different bouquets today. Becuase my husband is nuts, but incredibly sweet. It's nice to know we haven't become the "yes, I need time away from my spouse ALL THE TIME" couple. Heh.


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 1st, 2006 12:00 am (UTC)
Screw The Karl, how much do you miss me?
the "okay, breathe through your navel, strong center, now place your foot behind your head. Aaaaand, squat, and lift, and squat, 12 more.." etc. shit.

Are you sure that you weren't, by accident, watching videos on 100% natural constipation remedies?
Feb. 1st, 2006 12:16 am (UTC)
Re: Screw The Karl, how much do you miss me?
I think we both of us fell off the LJ Earth.

It could have been a constipation remedy. Might have been, in fact. But I'd hope that a constipation remedy video would feature women who didn't *look* that constipated.

I've got several "beginner" yoga and pilates tapes. They're funny. Apparently "I know nothing about yoga" means to them that you should be able to get into complicated positions flawlessly immediately. They also assume you don't have boobs.
Feb. 2nd, 2006 02:21 am (UTC)
A Pimp Named Slickback
Oh, that reminds me that i won yoga lessons at a silent auction last June that i haven't used. I intended on taking them before the World Series of Poker on the off-chance that they'd help mentally prepare me or some shit like that, but i had volleyball injuries that made yoga sound even more unpleasant. Then again, my boobs are slightly smaller than yours, so perhaps it'll be okay...

Anyway, i lost your phone number (again) when my cell phone disappeared over Xmas. If you wanted to send it to me that'd be swell. I have even more minutes now on my cell phone to use (calling you, perhaps?), since i had to upgrade my voice plan to get a full discount on my PDA data plan.

For better or for worse, i'm even more geek-enabled than before.
Feb. 1st, 2006 06:41 pm (UTC)


Kick, punch and KNEE your way thin whilst having bits of elastic tied between your feet and hands. I was literally STUNNED into gaping amazitastics when I stumbled across it on a teleshopping channel.

I wish my name was Billy Blanks :(
Feb. 1st, 2006 06:49 pm (UTC)
The overly fake-tanned man-beast in the video I had was named Lynda Leene. These HAVE TO BE made up names. (and a made up gender in this chick's case)

Billy Blanks is old hat around here. He's the "Tae-Bo" guy. A made up "boxing exercise" thing that was so incredibly popular a few years ago.
Feb. 1st, 2006 07:45 pm (UTC)
I'm going to change my name to Johnny Jumpington.

Billy can't be old hat, all he needs is to appear on adultswim or some other thing that the kids watch these days he'll be mega popular again. I mean he's got an entire routine based upon shadow kickboxing. It's impossible not to enjoy it.

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )


A Non-Newtonian Fluid

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