Congress Passes "America is #1" Bill
"Whooooooooo!" Shout Legistlators
October 6, 1999
WASHINGTON, DC - With Wall Street booming, the U.S. military standing tall, and Mark McGwire kicking ass and taking names, Congress passed the Helms-Bayh "America is #1" bill by an overwhelming majority Monday.
"My esteemed colleagues, all of us have long known that America is number one," said Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott, announcing the bill's 92-7 passage. "But now it is official. USA! USA! USA!"
Lott's statement, which was met with cheering, whistling, and foot-stomping was followed by the playing of Lee Greenwood's "God Bless The USA"- blared over the congressional sound system. As the song played, a group of senators hoisted Lott onto their shoulders and threw him in the air.
I love The Onion. I'm glad Karl re-upped our subscription. I'm even gladder (yeah, I said it) that it's the special "USA! USA! USA!" issue. Kind of spooky how apt an article from 8 years ago is today.
People don't really get any smarter. I include myself in this because I'm "people" to someone else. I stumbled across another "Oh my god, it's so obvious that the movie 300 is all about the 'war on terror' and is just propaganda about hating the "dark people"" post just a bit ago. 300 was definitely propaganda. It was based on the the bullshit story that one of the soldiers told everyone else in order to gain recruits for the Spartan army. He found a cunning way to make a crushing defeat into a huge boon for the morale of the Spartan people and they went on cranking out the militaristic "warriors" they were known for. Frank Miller based his graphic novel (which had a collected version published in 1998 but serialized versions before that) mostly on the movie "The 300 Spartans" which was released in 1962. The story of the 300 Spartans and the Persian army is based in truth but highly distorted through retelling, myth making, and purposeful propaganda.
But ya know - it conveniently fits current issues if you try hard enough so it's OBVIOUSLY all about the war in Iraq.