A Non-Newtonian Fluid (maddening) wrote,
A Non-Newtonian Fluid

I don't post here much at the moment because my mental energy is absolutely flat-lined.

But we bought a new mattress that is so fantastic I cannot even begin to explain. And it actually makes it difficult to get the hell out of bed whether I've slept a full night or not.

I'm sort of ridiculously off. I haven't swept the house in weeks and GOD does it show. The front room is clogged with boxes that need to be broken down for recycling. I have to think 3 days in advance to ensure that I have something to wear for a standing Thursday appointment, and the wall calendar that's directly in front of me is flipped to October. Of 2006.

But I guess I'm okay on the whole. We're a little broke, pretty damned stressed out and tired, and not really doing half the things we feel like we should. But I'm kind of sick to death of beating myself up for not being/doing/feeling/etc. how I think I should. I'm just gonna do what I do on a day to day basis and be happy with whatever gets done.

I'm trying to take the time to listen to music more often. Use up leftovers. I bought a bunch of reuseable bags for grocery shopping and that will be awesome. We can't leave a Wegmans without 40 bags. The cashiers have all apparently been abused by that one idiot old lady who freaks out about having anything touch anything or be on top of anything else. I just had it all crammed into my cart for an hour, dude... pack those fucking bags up. (one of the things I like about Trader Joes is not only the all paper thing but the way they will pack THE FUCK out of those bags). I want to make tamales. I want to get a better coffee maker. I want to have an office max shopping spree and not feel guilty about having nowhere to store it. I want to take a nap on the awesome bed with Karl and Mika in the middle of the day when the sun is making the room warm and sleeping for an hour feels like 4.

so uh .. yeah. heh.

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